En Route

Almost regardless of the destination or purpose, traveling is inherently appealing to me. However advances in marketing intelligence are pushing me to redefine how I perceive travel. Those pesky marketers have really stripped so much romance from the world (and lead to the debt crisis, I might add). Laugh if you must, but it is true.

I came to this minor revelation while flipping through the latest in-flight magazine, where my wallet was literally burning a hole in my pocket. I wanted to buy it all! (Wo)man of the world sandals to tromp through the jungles of Bali, sleek luggage to jet set around in Prague, plush treetop cabins from which you can watch gorillas in Uganda -  everything packaged in a very luxurious, sleek, discriminating manner. Admittedly, I loved every bit of it but there was an uneasiness to how indistinguishably elegant it all was. It wasn't the same - at all - but then again, it felt all too similar.

Uniformity had always been the antithesis of how I defined travel, or so I thought.

NonUniform: Getting in this "boat" with Chubbs, my mom (wearing her finest banana leaf hat) and two pirate types off the coast of Mombasa in the late 90s wearing only a shiny ,silver bathing suit. I burned to a crisp on the equator.

Here is Tings on his first flight where I flew solo with the him to Wisconsin to see friends.

 I bought him the stuffed monkey as a reminder of the trip and for being so good. My first-time parenting behavior was illogical.

  This is the nice part of travel being so accessible versus in prior generations. In six years, these kids have got to hang as much as some of our friends who live 40 miles away.

Here he is again at three when he and G would done massive helmets, fall asleep to the vibrations of the snowmobile and knock their helmets on the dashboard killing the power and sending the driver into a ditch. The funnier part was we, parents, thought they were afflicted by a weird unknown sickness until we stated piecing together how remarkable their recovery was…!

I can clearly remember our first trip to England where B and I were standing in the Delta priority line with four big suitcases, a car seat and stroller and Tings balanced precariously on top. I had worn all black and Tingu had spit up my shoulder -  amused at the realization that our champagne sipping days on the plane were clearly over. Also made a note to wear prints with toddlers….. always.

Flying business with kids – not only do you get the wrathful stares of your fellow neighbors but also lose your seat and  when you do actually sit down, your husband may take great pleasure in showing your six month old how to play with the seat remote…

Tings was so easy to travel with at this age. We took him to Canada and convinced all our friends that traveling with children was a breeze and they should have them too.

Life barely changes. Hahahaha – not  that we knew any better at that time (or to really stand further away from the Falls)….! The Tings was a dream. 

Then we went on a few trips to see Chubbs in New York. Tingu has already proclaimed his love for that city – primarily for the for the dinosaur museum and China town! I hope he gets the chance to live there for a few months as an adult, preferably on expenses (speak to you Uncle Ani on this topic). The second trip, while a lot of fun, lead to another realization that my days of wanting to live in The City were no longer. Fun was being redefined by Tings – what kept him happy and entertained – kept me happy. Sipping cocktails and shopping in swank shops was not on the list, informal restaurants with balcony’s where Tings could wave at strangers, dogs and taxis were.

This should have been a lesson noted prior to going to our friends' wedding in Tunisia  I wasn't entirely comfortable with my changing frame of reference on how I traveled – first class planes seats I could give up but missing out on a night of festivities as the waves from the Gulf of Hammamet crashed against the rocky shoreline of Cap Bon. Ouch.



I felt selfish joining in evening cocktails or late night dancing while Tingu wanted me to read nursery books and sing lullabies. I know enough to know that there is going to be a point when my child does not want to hang out with me and even sooner that he will realize how tone-deaf I am so I snuggled up with Tings in the hotel room and sang. I told myself I can revisit the Gulf later and felt better by convincing myself I was keeping him away from hookah smoke and loud music however the truth was, I was looking for an Angelina Jolie-style nanny in north-Africa vacation.

Enjoying a lovely lunch with the newly weds at a quaint street side cafe; attempting to discreetly change a diaper under the table. Indian mothers don't do public bathrooms! 

When I realized that wasn't going to be happening, I decided to put travel on hold for a bit. For the record,  not only is the Tunisian culture one of the most affectionate and accommodating of children I've ever encountered but even our friends and their families semi-adopted Tingu for the vacation.

Center photo is a complete stranger's child!

Tings, for his part, was absolutely great  and charmed all the beautiful Tunisian ladies as well as a group of very pretty teenage girls in the back of the plane! For future reference, Tings, you smiled a toothless grin and pointed out how her toenail polish matched her shirt. They were smitten.

 I thought this hold on international travel was a great loss. My notion of travel and reality of traveling with children were oceans apart. However I felt it was a necessary sacrifice to hold my standards of travel intact and wait it out until the kids got older.  It is only in retrospect that I can say that we found infinite amounts of fulfillment in trips to Florida, the mountains, and our backyard.

It all becomes so apparent that we were after a unique pursuit of exploration. Travel was a term loosely used by me to mean so much more than Webster intended. By distinguishing travel from exploring, I am redefining how I like to vacation. How I travel should be uniform and to the highest standards possible:

The boys (perhaps rightly so) were always very interested in the flight safety instructions. These are actual ones - the shark is awesome, I wonder what airline that was on. Anyway, for months afterward, when we would tell Hunie that we were having vistors coming in on a plane, he would raise his hands in lift-off and then crash it down joyously inquiring, "Crash? Boom? Bang!!". I think he thought that was a normal flight path. 

Tings shushed us to pay attention while Hunie gave his own commentary to the demonstration. He enjoyed his own dialogue so much that, at numerous points in the journey, he would loudly admonish the pilot when  an announcement on turbulence or whatever uninterrupted his movie. It sounds a bit rude but was really very funny. (" AWWW REALLY??!! You need to be quiet! This is a good part! HUSH!")

How we explore the destination and people are completely different and continue to evolve as the kids get older and we evolve as a family.

It took B &  I seven years and a rather pricey sum to get our vacation styles aligned:

The Hotel Bora Bora provided the ultimate unscripted underwater safari in very nice accommodations! 

So as the era of finding unique experiences in Tupperware drawer comes to a close, we have started making treks again.

Ready to Go! (No surprise that this one affixes safety tags to himself!)

The exploration is not as raw as I like it but similar to cultivating a complex palate, we start with small bites of the essentials and plenty of supplements by ways of nice hotels, easy transport and laid-back plans!

(p.s. For the record my complex palate includes the finer subtleties of fruit pastilles - thanks, Kates!)

Udaipur Lake Palace 2011

Try as I might - I can never get those perfect shots! Tings debuted this stellar look time and again in London. He called it 'Angry Chipmunk'. 

The Hundoggie writing postcards to his pals. It included pictures of Mini's and the Titanic sinking...

At the Mexican restaurant around the corner! Post vacation, Tings was so used to posing around town, he thought he was doing me a favor when he asked me to take a picture here with him and his most convincing smile!